General

Everyone Needs a Good Swingline

I think the world would be a much better and safer place if everyone had a swingline stapler. It makes pefece sense if you think about it. What does a stapler do for you? It brings chaotic papers into a single file marching army. Once you put that staple in the top left hand corner, you feel more comfortable around the paper. If it was not for the staple, you probably would think twice about going to sleep or having your children run around the desk. The stapler is safety. It is a state of mind that is achieved by the false impressions of safety. I mean seriously, ever staple your finger? What kind of safety is that? If the Swingline model really cared about us, the users, it would put a finger guard in. I mean how much money could this really cost? A simple plastic devide to pevent me stapling the papers to my lovely index finger. All said and done, my Swingline never leaves my sight. I think about it at night. I think about in the morning. When I go to work I tell the one at my house that I will be back soon and then five minutes later I gladly greet the second one. We are like family, the swinglines and me. Like carrots and peas. We have been through a lot and understand each others emotions, frustrations, and fears. We know how much to push each other. If it was not for my Swingline, I do not know what I would do.

– George